I’ve been meaning to blog for the past few days, I just keep on getting sidetracked. Today, I have none to report except:

1. My computer is losing disk space fast, and my music habit isn’t getting any better.

2.  I’ve been listening to the song mentioned below on repeat for the past few hours.

3. I realized that my favorite asian music artists actually do come to the US sometimes, which requires MONEY to see them, it all leads back to money doesn’t it?

4.  I realized that I’ve grown more in this year than I thought I could ever, I’m less awkward around people, and I care less about what others say or do.

5. I can actually generally understand the words that hardcore bands say in their songs now. I’m not sure if this has anything to do with the state of my ears or not, but it makes it more enjoyable.

6. I read Tithe By Holly Black, it was better than I thought it would be, and some parts would make a conservative person open their mouth in shock, and suprised me for a teen book. I give it a 7/10, I started ironside a couple hours ago, after deciding to skip Valient. I would recommend it to people, if you like stories with faeries in them.

7. I’m pretty sure that a dancing career is out of my reach of possibility, but I am still hoping for a job that has to do with theater, maybe something technical. I envy people that have great voices because It would be great to be involved in musical theater. I would just like to be close to the action if has something to do with acting, Broadway, or dancing. Just to be close would make me happy.

Well, thats basically it for today. I would leave with some thoughtful quote but I don’t have one.

Kim

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Now playing: The Early November – Decoration
via FoxyTunes

Shallowness, Deceit, and let me throw in some ideas about wishing people were intelligent, why don’t I?

Well basically, this blog was inspired by a conversation I had with some girls at my school. My first point is that: The complaining of other people should be banned sometimes, especially when its stupid complaining. So these girls were complaining about how English has no meaning in the world and that you won’t use symbolism in real life.  I, as the English lover I am, disagreed. They also said that authors probably didn’t take so much time to make things symbolic and have meaning, which is pretty much completely false. I understand it takes a lot of thinking to write a book, you need a plot and substance. Without some underlying meaning the book has no substance, I know I analyze all my fantasy writing for substance. They basically bashed reading in general. Then I responded with, “well, you said nobody reads, for symbolism, But I look for it in each book I read, i love books for that reason, They need underlying meaning to be worth it.” The girls respond with “well I find the underlying meaning in tanning salons and parties…”

So, at this time, I’m basically in a state of utter speechlessness, and wondering how they got into this collegiate school. They also claimed you will not need to know how to write a paper in life, another one of those claims that makes you wonder about people.

This got me thinking about people and shallowness. Most people are shallow, even if they don’t admit it. Some more than others. Just another flaw in the human race I guess.

So, not about the deceit part, so basically my friend got blamed for a party full of drugs that just because she was new to that social group and the parents refused to believe their perfect kids would do anything.  It makes me sad when I think of how blind a person can be, especially all knowing adults who claim to be teaching the next generation, its sickening.

Incidents like this make me pretty much lose hope in people, well the little hope I had. I can see why people say that we are headed to out own destruction, you know?

again, I shall leave you with that, have to finish a paper

Random Bloggest

Kim

Today, is basically the same as yesterday, nothing really in mind to rant about, but as I think and type something usually rears its head

Tonight, is the Band of Horses concert, but I am sadly not there. That’s the downside of being unemployed in life. I hope that this summer I will be able to start working and actually get some money, but Hopefully I’ll be able to avoid the usual movie theater job.

I also go back to school tomorrow, back to cramped hallways and annoying girls gabbing about things that unimportant. Back to funny moments and back to pompous know it all people. How excited I am. I wish this weekend didn’t have to end, I got to reconnect with people that I haven’t talked to in awhile, the people that made my year’s best moments last year. and through them, I started this little ol’ blog of mine, one of the most exciting things I’ve done with this computer in awhile.

But today, many possible book or story ideas came to my head, but I am weary of expressing them because they seem to change day to day. It was exciting because, I haven’t had much time to think of things other than schoolwork since It got back in session and all the drama that comes with it, for the first time, me and a friend went are separate ways on a bad note. The odd part is that I hardly feel any regret toward this incident, even if its supposed to be my fault. I miss her yes, but not “cut my heart out” miss her. Sometimes, I swear, I seem like a bitch ice cube, an ice cube that enjoys hugs as much as a normal person, though. But yes, I would think I would be more effected, but I’m not, which is annoying. Its strange how I surprise myself like that.

But, there is nothing much I can do about it now, my reaction is my reaction. and besides, maybe this is one of those things that was bound to happen. Life can be a pain like that, I first typed the sentence saying fate, but if I say that it would mean I accept the fact that some force is up there pulling my tangled puppet strings. Not sure about you, but that sounds very unpleasant to me.

I shall leave you with that thought, school work calls as usual. Don’t be surprised if I post again tonight though, its hard to stay away.

Your rambling blogger,

Kim

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Now playing: Arcade Fire – (Antichrist Television Blues)
via FoxyTunes

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Now playing: Arcade Fire – (Antichrist Television Blues)
via FoxyTunes

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Now playing: Arcade Fire – Keep The Car Running
via FoxyTunes

But while I’m posting I’d like to post one of my favorite quotes from A Clockwork Orange, it may be hard to understand since its in nadsat (the slang the characters use constantly)…

 ”yes yes yes, there it was. Youth Must go, ah yes, But youth is only being in a way like it might be an animal. No, it is not just like being an animal so much as being like one of those malenky toys you viddy being sold in the streets, like a chellovecks made out of tin and with a spring inside and then winding handle on the outside and you wind it up grr grr grr and off it itties like walking, O my brothers. But it itties in a straight line and bangs straight into things bang bang and it cannot help what it is doing. Being young is like being like one of these malenky machines.” -A Clockwork Orange, Chapter 21

First quote is from the song this blog is named after, yes, how unpredictable, right?

Well, honestly, I have know idea what to say in this post, like usual.

So basically, I will try very hard to post in this every single day and actually try and post something meaningful here, maybe even some of my writing, but that can only happen when Rachel (my laptop) starts working again. So for now I shall ramble:

My life has gotten very tedious and boring, its school, dance, paper and homework, bedtime. Every single day. The only thing that ahs really been keeping me from a being bored, even if boredom is a state of mind, is reading. If You’ve seen my email and names on other sites, you can already tell that books are a big part of my oh so exciting excistence. The most recent I’ve read is the last in Gemma Doyle series, The Other Boelyn Girl, and A Clockwork Orange. I recommend them all, if you are not easily offended by things that are sexual, and things considered out of the ordinary.

The highlight of was last week was watching a very bad interpretation of a song from High School Musical, which was about one of the funniest specticals I have seen this year but, its still a low point when compared with other expriences.

School seems like its swallowing my life whole and sleeping seems to be my pass time now, oh and seeing movies. I’ve seen more movies in the past week then I saw last year. Most good, some awful.

I’m also going through music withdraw, you see with rachel down, about half my music is not on my new ipod, which I am still coming up with a name for. My last one was Pablo, but I want this one to be more impressive sounding. But, its hard to be deprived of the Shins disography for such a long amount of time, you know?

But yes, it seems like my life is going through a spriral. Its less stressful than last year of course, but not exciting enough to keep me looking to the future as I usually do. I hope this will change as the months go on, I truly do. It also seems like time is closing in, in two years I will be off to college doing what nobody knows what, which is exciting in some ways. For instance, I will no longer have to go through the charade of church going, and my mom will probably accept the fact that I am an athiest for right now better than she would if I was living in the house. But, I also have fears. The fear that I will become completely dependent on my family financially, the fear that whatever I do in life won’t satisfy me, and a whole list more. I notice more in the past month then in any other because of the fact that I am in the middle of learning how to drive, and that in the next six months I shall be drving myself places and putting my life in the hands of my confused self and the other idiots that somehow got a licence. Soon, I’ll be off to college and meeting new people and expiriencing how much life can really throw at me. The only thing I can seem to do is cross my fingers and hope that I have what its takes to last out in the world, and all of its terrifying offerings.

Ok, end blog

Sincerly, Kim